Clicker Kid Gets Dressed
Today I finally got sick of the whole “get dressed do your teeth routine” which takes forever and often involves more manhandling of the child than I can do at the moment, and more tears than is pleasant, and decided to start clicking for what I wanted.
What a difference - I wish I’d done it earlier but [Insert long list of excuses why not] I didn’t.
INGREDIENTS
1 X 3 year old who hates getting dressed & doing teeth
7 x mini Pebbles, Smarties, M&M’s or similar - about 5mm diamater
1 x container to hold treats
1 x clicker (optional)
1 x parent in the right head space
METHOD
- Make a show of counting out small treats (mini m&m’s) into container so that child knows you’re doing it.
- Explain that these are treats for getting dressed and doing your teeth.
- Ignore pang of guilt as imaginary dentist tells you that giving sweets right after doing teeth is counter productive
- Tell child you’re off to bedroom/bathroom and that they need to come with you if they want them
- If child normally wouldn’t do that, and this time they do, click and treat when you get to destination or significantly underway. Click marks that they have done what you want - you want to get a click (or OK or similar) in so that you can do less instant treating in the future.
- Tell child that they will get one treat per item of clothing
- At this point my child starts messing around, so I left the room as I was making decision not to “play” our usual game of cajolling him into getting dressed.
- Child is upset that usual game doesn’t work.
- Explain that today we are doing clicks and treats for getting dressed, would he like another chance.
- Yes please.
- Back to room, child is allowed to wear the clicker.
- Child steps into knickers on count of 3, gets a click and chooses treat
- Child steps into trousers (no counting required), gets a click and chooses treat
- Remove shirt, put on t-shirt (usually a big struggle to get night shirt off and clean one on), Child very happy to comply, gets clicker back too, gets click and treat.
- Put on socks - click and treat
- Put on shoes - click and treat
- Child fully dressed in record time! Mum not feeling cross yay!
CLEANING TEETH & WASHING FACE
- Again show/tell there are treats
- Count to 3 was needed for child allowing teeth to be brushed
- Child stands still, opens mouth etc
- Praise, click, treat
- Child stands still with face forward for face wash
- Click & treat
Again, child is happy, mum is happy, all done nice and quickly.
Once I’ve got this one established, so that we have the idea of a non confrontational get ready embedded, then I’ll work up to putting on his clothes himself, and to putting in a “marker” for the treats like a button or a bead so that particularly the teeth treat might get collected later when I won’t feel so guilty.
We had been doing “you can’t have a DVD until you’ve had breakfast & are dressed”, the problem with that though is that when it all takes such a long time, there isn’t time for a DVD before we go out to daycare or other activities anyway. The no DVD until those things are done will still apply, but I think the direct clicking approach will speed the whole proces up and hopefully he’ll get to a point where he is earning “tokens” which he can then use to “buy” DVD time.